


Snape's Best Memories

by queensusan



Series: Pranks and Consequences [8]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Enemies to Lovers, Eventual Romance, Falling In Love, Frottage, Grinding, Hand Jobs, Invisibility Cloak, M/M, Quidditch, Semi-Public Sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-12
Updated: 2018-05-13
Packaged: 2019-05-05 20:46:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,516
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14626715
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/queensusan/pseuds/queensusan
Summary: This set of vignettes bridges the gap between Pranks and Consequences and Swing, in which James and Severus go from enemies-with-benefits, tentatively to friendship and then to love.  This is bonus content, as it is on-going and will be added to if/when I have the interest.  It is not required reading to understand the rest of the series.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I've always felt like I missed out on a lot of relationship development in this series by going directly from Consequences, when things were really unsettled between the boys, to the end of 6th year in Swing, where they were much more well adjusted and on the cusp of admitting they were in love with each other. Therefore, I've gone back and set Pranks and Consequences during their 5th year and I plan to write a few scenes of 5th and 6th year for the boys showing the relationship development where they go from enemies to real boyfriends. I'm not sure how long this will be and this story may be open for quite a while as I add scenes to it as I'm inspired.
> 
> So, if you've already read the whole series this is all new content, and if you haven't read the series this does not have to be read in order. This will be more relationship development instead of plot development. 
> 
> This story begins the evening of Consequences

Severus wasn't sure James was holding up well under the strain of the day. He was gloomily sitting next to Severus at the Slytherin table for the evening meal, but he kept glancing back over at the Gryffindors. Black was pointedly ignoring them, but Severus could see the longing in Potter's eyes. Lupin and Pettigrew, at least, were returning James's looks with sympathy from Lupin and ravenous curiosity from Pettigrew. Lily was pretending like she didn't know any of them, Severus included.

Severus could tell James was truly missing his friends and wanted to go and try to pacify them. Pathetic, really, since he'd only been estranged from them for a single day, but Severus had known James and his pack were unnaturally close. 

Severus was at war with himself. No matter that he just might be developing a certain... softening of emotions for James, he _loathed_ Black. And yet... if he tried to keep James from his friends, would that really end well? Severus was wise enough to realize that while he might be successful in turning James against Black at least, he could very well turn James against _him_ in the process. And was James resenting Severus for causing a rift in his friendship with Black really the way he wanted to start... whatever they were to each other?

A week previously he'd thought what he and James had was nothing more than convenient fucking because they were only fifteen and desperate to be touched by another willing human, but their public declaration had done something strange to the way Severus viewed what they were privately as well, because James had not abandoned him when it would have been the easiest course of action, and that meant _something_. Severus just wasn't sure what that something was. 

Impulsively, Severus turned and said very softly, just for James's ears: “Go sit with your friends, if you must.”

James looked up from his pork chops, hope in his eyes. “Won't you be...” he said slowly, but didn't seem to know what descriptor to pick. Angry? Envious? Abandoned?

Severus decided he could be generous. James had fulfilled his part of the bargain and had played his role as doting boyfriend, but that didn't mean he was tied to Severus's side. Severus didn't think he could stand to be around the boy for very long without the distraction of sex, anyway.

He rolled his eyes. “No,” he snapped. “I wouldn't have said so otherwise.” And then, ruining his aloof demeanor, he said hesitantly: “You could come back for breakfast. If you want to,” he hastily added.

James grinned and jumped up. “Okay,” he said brightly. “See you in the morning, Sev.” And then, while Severus was still struck dumb by the casual use of the nickname, James leaned down and gave Severus a quick peck on the corner of his open mouth before he grabbed his plate and headed for the Gryffindor table.


	2. Chapter 2

Severus could hear James galumphing down to the Slytherin table before the boy even showed up, the creaking of his Quidditch leathers and his confident stride producing an unapologetic noise that set Severus's teeth on edge. It didn't help that Severus noticed one or two of his younger classmates shoot James admiring glances before training their eyes back on their breakfast, as though embarrassed at themselves for looking. What was worse, when Severus turned to look at him it was obvious that James had noticed as well, for he was grinning brilliantly at the simpering girls.

Severus, who on a good morning could muster little more than a moderately polite greeting for his pretend beau, now scowled at him.

“Most people wait to change into their Quidditch gear until before the game,” he said coldly, knowing that James had only done it for the attention. His ego was a bloated as ever, despite the recent blow to his popularity his association with Severus had dealt him. After faltering for a few days, James had seemed to take it in stride, making it his goal to charm the Slytherins who sat nearest Severus on his morning meals at the green and silver table (very little progress there, Severus thought) while weaseling his way back into the good graces of his friends. He seemed to have had slightly more success with the latter goal.

James did that abhorrent hair ruffling thing he did, though this time it appeared to be for Severus's benefit. James sat down beside him on the bench, his legs spread as he straddled the wood. His knees touched Severus's thigh and arse intimately, as though James had every right to touch whatever part of Severus he chose to.

Severus could not stop himself from glancing down at James's tight Quidditch trousers and the bulge between his legs that Severus knew from intimate experience was perfectly... adequate. An unwelcome flush of arousal rippled through Severus, and the unpredictability of teenage hormones had him squirming and trying to suppress the sudden danger of an erection.

James, of course, hadn't missed his reaction. His smile turned into a leer and his eyes became quite focused on Severus, as though the other students around them did not exist, for all that Severus knew each of them was listening intently, though they may appear to be ignoring the lion in their midst.

“Aren't you going to wish me luck?” he asked, his tone painfully suggestive. Gryffindors were totally lacking in subtlety and it made Severus's sallow face burn with embarrassment, knowing they were being observed. He wasn't opposed to anyone knowing they were intimate because it wasn't really anything that hurt his dignity or reputation, but to publicly flaunt it was so _common_. So... Muggle.

He stood abruptly and grabbed James's arm, dragging him up off of the bench.

“Hey-” James exclaimed indignantly, but Severus just pulled him along, one hand clenched tightly around his sleeve. 

“Are you trying to humiliate me?” he whispered furiously as they walked, James allowing Severus to lead him, though his expression was far from happy.

“What are you talking about?” James asked, equally aggrieved. “What did I do? You are so fucking difficult to please!”

Severus supposed that James really had been trying to please him. He'd declared their relationship and he'd dutifully eaten every breakfast with Severus in the two weeks since. He'd been really quite generous when they'd met after hours in abandoned classrooms, and he'd joined Severus whenever he'd found him alone, choosing the study with Severus on the grounds or walk with him in between classes. It had really been quite pleasant, in truth, if it weren't for the sneaking suspicion that James had done it mainly because Black was still shunning him and Severus had been his second choice. 

Severus continued to lead the grumbling boy until they'd ascended several stairs, taken a few hallways and found an abandoned corridor they could speak in privately.

James shook Severus off when he been dragged into an empty, shrouded alcove. “What, Severus?” he asked tiredly, and Severus felt a pang of remorse. He had the sudden realization that, perhaps, James had been trying harder than he had.

Severus took a few deep breaths, cooling his temper. “I don't want you to do... that. In public, where anyone can see.”

James's eyebrows drew down in confusion. “Do what?”

Severus waved a vague hand at James, flustered. “That thing, with the tight trousers and the eyes and the-” he glanced down, at the bulge of James's cock, and felt his own cock stirring again. He let out an aggravated noise and ran both hands through his hair, feeling unbearably horny and irritated by his reaction.

James looked down, noticed the direction of Severus's gaze, and grinned evilly. “Let me get this right,” he said, his voice gleeful. “You're angry because I made you hot in public?”

Severus just glared at him, unwilling to admit it but unable to deny it.

James stepped closer, crowding into Severus's space. “We aren't in public now,” he said silkily. Severus stepped back to put more distance between them and only managed to back himself against the wall of the shaded alcove they were in.

“This isn't private,” he protested weakly. “Anyone could walk by. Peeves-”

“Will have seen worse,” James said cheerfully, but he also glanced around cautiously. And then, miracle of miracles, James pulled the satchel he'd had slung over his shoulder and Severus had assumed contained Quidditch supplies and instead pulled out his mysterious invisibility cloak.

Severus had never been allowed to examine it closely before, and now he eyed it with keen curiosity. It wasn't like any invisibility cloak he'd seen or heard of and the academic in him was eager to learn its secrets. James, however, had much more physical goals.

“If we put this over us and we're very quiet....” he suggested, smirking.

The idea was shocking and titillating. Although the hallway was not in the path of any house common room or classroom, it was not beyond the realms of possibility that someone, be they student, staff or ghost, might very well walk by. But would the cloak really be enough protection to shield them from discovery?

While Severus was still mulling it over James was taking action, sweeping the cloak over Snape and then stepping under it himself, drawing the folds of the voluminous cloak around them. Before Severus could point out their exposed feet, however, James was encouraging Severus down, so that he sat crossed legged on the stone floor and James settled down onto his lap, his thighs spread wide around his waist. It wasn't the most comfortable position, but when James fumbled at the front of his robes and then delved inside, unbuttoning his trousers and withdrawing Severus's tender cock, he stopped caring.

After a few moments of delicious stroking Severus woke up to his own obligations, reaching out and struggling with the ties of James's tight Quidditch uniform. James's enthusiastic writhing did not help him, and Severus was nearly panting with the need to touch James before he finally managed to get to him.

When Severus wrapped his hand around James's cock they both hissed with satisfaction. And then, when James had the brilliant idea of pressing closer into Severus's lap so that both of their cocks aligned, it was even better. Their hands clasped together, for once in perfect accord, one on top of the other, and they stroked their pricks in tandem. James groaned and Severus hushed him before giving a heartfelt moan of his own.

When James began thrusting his hips, grinding against Snape's cock, the head of James's cock rubbed against his frenulum in a way that was too much. Severus, with a complete lack of discretion, gave a cry of pleasure and came messily between them, his come sputtering up over their combined hands and onto their clothes. James laughed breathlessly and jerked a few more times against Severus's sensitive prick before he came too, hunched over their clasped hands and trembling.

They gasped in the shared humid air under the cloak as they caught their breath and came down from the high of orgasm. 

After a while James withdrew and tucked himself away, using his wand to clean their hands and his precious Quidditch uniform.

“Will you cheer for me?” James asked when he'd checked his presentability by the light of his wand. The question was asked off hand, as though he already knew Severus wouldn't, but when Severus scoffed and told him he would not even attend the match James looked genuinely offended.

“But-” he'd sputtered. It was the last match of the season, and as it was against Hufflepuff and it was almost a foregone conclusion that Gryffindor would win, Severus couldn't imagine why he thought Severus would care about the match. Regardless of the outcome Slytherin's poor performance that year meant they were no longer in the running for the Quidditch cup and many Slytherins had bitterly declared they would not even attend. 

“ _I'm_ playing,” James said, in a hurt tone of voice.

“So?” Severus asked coolly, still deliberately misunderstanding. “I'm not going to waste one of the last Saturdays before our OWL examinations at a Quidditch match.

James left shortly thereafter in a huff, and Severus was struck by... not regrets, but a pang of disappointment in himself. Well, if James had wanted a cheerleader he'd have picked any of the many girls who panted after him. 

Later, though, when he sat alone in the dungeons practicing his latest experimental potion he listened to the shouts of the students at the Quidditch pitch and thought about what it would have been like to be the sort of person who cheered for his boyfriend at a Quidditch match.

And then, almost as though he hadn't made the conscious decision to do so, Severus found himself putting a stasis charm over his ingredients and making his way up from the dungeons and out onto the grounds. He walked to the Quidditch pitch, passing the occasional Ravenclaw with their noses in a book or sneering Slytherin, and made his way towards the Slytherin stadium- which was much more well attended than the mutterings at breakfast had suggested it would be. In the end he did not make it up to join his classmates, for while he was still walking the players high above sped up as one of the flyers- James, of bloody course- began to make a spectacular dive that had the announcer screaming excitedly. Severus watched from his unique vantage point as James sank dangerously low, the Hufflepuff seeker laughably far behind, and then reached out an arm and snagged a snitch so small Severus couldn't even see it.

James gracefully descended the rest of the way, his fist held high in triumph. His teammates followed behind him, each jumping and screaming with happiness, knowing they'd won the Quidditch cup again. Severus scowled as James's friends, Sirius included, flooded the field to congratulate the team. Sirius kept his distance from James, still aloof, but Severus could see the way he looked at James, as though holding his grudge was growing more difficult.

Severus was going to leave and pretend he'd never come, he really was, but then James spotted him through the growing horde of Gryffindors. Their eyes met across the field and James's grin grew impossibly wider. He raised his hand, as though to wave, before checking his enthusiasm and nodding at him instead. Severus granted him a small, quick smile, before turning and retreating to the castle, not wanting to be swept up into the furor of celebration.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and because it's me, I had to insert some smut. More to come, I'm afraid. Oh, I also discovered after I'd written this that James was not actually a seeker, but a chaser. He's portrayed as a seeker in the movies apparently, however, so I decided to keep it. It's not like this story is very canon anyway. :D Next up, I'll be re-writing Snape's worst memory and making it a best memory instead because that's what fanfiction is for.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Re-reading the Snape's Worst Memory chapter of OOTP reminded me what absolutely awful bullies the Marauders were and how disgusting Severus was too. Hmm. I'm afraid it's just not in me to write the characters so nasty, so I'm sorry about that. Anyway, this is Snape's worst memory turned into one of his best memories instead. 
> 
> Also, I thought that the Lupin incident happened later on, like during their 7th year when I think in canon it's already happened in 5th year. For the sake of our story, the whole tricking Severus into Lupin's werewolf path doesn't happen. Snape finds out, through Legillimency, that Lupin is a werewolf, so he wouldn't fall for the trick, and knowing and not wanting to lose James over it, he keeps his mouth shut about it. 
> 
> We're playing fast and loose with canon here, folks.

By the time Flitwick cried out the ending of the OWL exam, Severus was so lost in his essay that it felt as though he were swimming up from a deep pool. He blinked blearily into the bright, suddenly noisy Great Hall as exams flew up and floated to the front, overwhelming the little professor. Severus had been in the middle of corrections and felt a pang of regret at the interruption, though no real concern. The exam questions had been satisfyingly interesting and he'd poured all his knowledge and passion into it and he knew, deep in his bones, that he'd gotten an Outstanding on it.

He shifted in his seat subtly and looked over at James, wondering how he'd done, and found James turned in his seat as well and grinning back at Black. Recently they seemed to have truly reconciled, and as a consequence Severus had seen less of James. Though he still ate breakfast with Severus and found him on the grounds to study together, James's evenings seemed to be for his friends once more.

Severus told himself very firmly that he was not jealous.

With determination, Severus looked away from them and back at his exam paper notes, going over what he'd written and wondering if there had been anything he'd have embellished or edited. He got up when his classmates began to leave, following the crowd while studying his notes, not paying much attention to anyone else. Most of the students filtered out onto the grounds, enjoying the relief of completing one more OWL and enjoy the late spring sunshine. Not particularly liking sunshine, Severus wandered over to sit under the shade of a clump of bushes.

He immersed himself in his notes, obsessively going over every detail of the test until he just couldn't stand to anymore. He stood up, stretching his cramped body. His hair hung in oily strands in his face and he pushed it away in frustration. It needed cutting, but the pocket money he'd swiped from his father last summer was long gone and he was too afraid of a humiliating hair cut to risk letting anyone untrained at it. Sighing and swearing to himself that one day he would have more money than he knew what to do with, he walked out of the shrubs and began to make his way back across the grounds towards the castle.

He was startled, however, to come upon James and his friends sitting under a beech tree by the lake, having unintentionally almost walked right into them.

He froze, his hand automatically going for his wand, an old protective instinct that his truce with James had not quelled. He held it in his hand uncertainly as the four boys watched him, no one seeming quite sure how to react. In the past he'd have already been spitting hexes and James and Black would have already been attacking him in return, but their current situation was precarious and no one seemed to know the protocol. It was the first time Severus had really come face to face with James's friends since they'd found out about them, and it was awkward and potentially dangerous. 

Lupin watched for only a moment before he buried his nose back in his book, looking uncomfortable. Lupin had never actively targeted Severus the way James and Black had, but he'd never discouraged it either, which had done nothing to earn Severus's respect. And then there was the little matter of being a _werewolf_ that Severus had discovered through using Legillimency on James, and everyone knew werewolves couldn't be trusted. 

Pettigrew practically vibrated with eagerness, his ratty little eyes flicking from Severus to James and then to Black, eager for a fight. Pettigrew was much too cowardly to start anything, but he was always happy to encourage discord, and though Severus knew he could crush the boy in any fair duel, Pettigrew never did anything that wasn't underhanded.

As for Black, his mouth was sealed but his face was furiously red and James was looking between Black and Severus with clear indecision on his face, as though he were having to choose between them. Suddenly angry and knowing who James would choose if it came down to that, Severus just scoffed at James and turned to skirt around them in order to avoid the public humiliation of being shunned by what the school that was his boyfriend.

“Running away, Snivellus?” he heard Black call and he swiveled back around so suddenly that he almost lost his balance. All thoughts of fleeing and saving his dignity vanished. He gripped his wand hard, his vision turning black with rage. His whole arm tingled with the desire to hurt Black, to use every hex he'd ever heard of or invented himself to make him bleed. Only knowing that he'd lose James if he did so stopped him, and that was pushing his self control to the breaking point. 

Black and James were on their feet, both with the wands in their hands. Black was looking at Severus with hatred in his face, but he hadn't yet thrown a hex either. Perhaps he feared losing James as well. 

“Sirius, no,” James said uneasily. He was holding his wand as well but Severus wasn't sure if it was to keep the two from fighting or if it was to join in the defense of his friend or lover, whoever he might choose. 

The thought of James hurting him when he'd grown so used to the boy doing everything to please him instead was a bitter one. It was easy to forget how horrible James had been to him in the past when he was eating breakfast with him every morning and giving him hand jobs while smiling sweetly up at him at night, but now Severus remembered every insult and humiliation. Never mind that he'd hurled his fair share of vitriol back.

“I was watching him during the exam, his nose was touching the parchment,” said Sirius viciously. “There'll be great grease marks all over it, they won't be able to read a word. And you want to fuck _that_? Hell, I'd have blown you if you were that desperate.”

“Sirius, enough!” James said sharply, now taking a step closer to Severus, as though Black's words had scored Severus an invisible point.

By now an interested crowd had gathered around them, everyone curious about the confrontation. Peripherally Severus noticed Lily join them, her face creased in concern as she took in the situation. Lily had been much warmer to him lately as she'd grown accustomed to the idea of Severus and James together, and Severus felt a little more settled, knowing he had his best friend at his side.

She came up beside him, her presence steady and solid.

“Jealous, Black?” Severus asked softly, a sneer in his voice. He seriously doubted Sirius actually had any physical desire for James, but for the first time it occurred to Severus that Black might instead be jealous of the time and attention Severus demanded of James. James shot him a quelling glare, though he took yet another step towards Severus, shaking his head discouragingly at Black.

“Sirius, Severus is my boyfriend and I can't let you talk about him like that.” James's voice was not particularly confident or assertive, as though with every word he cringed inside, not wanting to damage the friendship with Black he'd only just won back. He reached out and caught Severus's hand though and gave it a squeeze, as public a showing of support as Severus could have desired. For the first time the possibility that James would choose him instead of Black occurred to Severus. “You don't have to be friends, but you can be civil,” James said, his voice a little firmer now.

“We'll never be friends,” Sirius hissed, but his voice wasn't as poisonous. Instead it was defeated and bitter, knowing he'd lost the fight.

Severus shot him a triumphant smirk and squeezed James's hand. Excitement and happiness were bubbling up his throat, making his want to burst into delighted laughter, despite the tense situation. It was everything he'd wanted when he'd coerced James into announcing their relationship, but it felt like more than anything he could have hoped for because James had chosen _him_. That in and of itself was more wonderful than Severus could have imagined. 

“I know,” James told Black, his own voice tired and defeated. “Come on, Sev,” James said, and began to tug him by the hand away from his friends. Lily followed on Severus's other side, her beautiful red hair glinting in the sunlight.

“I didn't think you'd do that, Potter,” she said, looking over at him with something like respect. “Stand up to Black like that.”

James, who'd been chewing anxiously on his lip, looked over at her in gratification. “I guess I haven't given you any reason to,” he muttered. “But I'm not just yanking Sev around, you know. I care about him.”

Lily looked surprised, but not displeased. As for Severus, the warmth in his belly seemed to explode into a fireball of elation. For all that he knew James was only saying the words to satisfy Lily, that it was just an act to keep in Severus's good graces and consequently keep his access to Severus's body, it felt so good to hear the words. 

He knew that if he wasn't careful he'd start to believe James, but even that thought wasn't enough to dampen his happiness.

She just smiled and shook her head. “Merlin,” she said in amazement. “I'll just leave him to you then, shall I?” she asked and gave Severus a cheeky wink- as close to approving as she'd probably get, and wandered off to join her friends.

Severus thought about telling James that he hadn't thought he'd stand by him either, but decided that expressing his doubts in him probably was not the best way to reward James. Instead he tugged him back to the castle, thinking he would take him down to the abandoned classroom he thought of as theirs and show James exactly what his good behavior had earned him.

**

A cloud of dust billowed around them when Severus dropped down onto the pile of old tapestries they'd piled into a corner of the classroom to serve as a makeshift bed. His robes fell around his waist, revealing his bare, white legs and his dingy pants. It wasn't an appealing sight, by practically anyone's standards, and he hastily began to rearrange his robes to cover himself, but James stopped him with a hand on his wrist.

“You didn't have trousers on?” he asked eagerly. “This whole time? During the test and all?”

All of Severus's trousers were embarrassingly short and he hadn't the money to buy more and owls home to beg more of his mother had been met with silence. Now that the weather was warmer he'd taken to abandoning his trousers and allowing his overlong robes to cover his bare legs instead. It wasn't an unheard of practice, but usually only girls did it.

“It's been warm enough,” he muttered evasively, not wanting James to know the real reason why.

“You mean all this time all I would have had to do was reach under your robe,” James said, demonstrating the maneuver by sliding his hand up Severus's calf and then up to his thigh. He gripped the scrawny muscle there as though it were something special. His eyes were dark and hungry. He used both of his hands to caress Severus's stringy thighs, each brush of his hand bringing him closer to Severus's pants.

“They aren't dirty,” Severus said in a hurry, referring to the threadbare grey pants that pooled around his groin. They _weren't_ dirty, they were just fucking old. They'd been his fathers when they were new and they'd been passed down to him years ago. They were too loose and had been washed so many times they'd never be white again, no matter how much attention the house elves paid to them. 

James barely seemed to notice. He'd seen Severus's ancient pants anyway and he'd never said anything before. Instead he slipped his fingers under the hem and began to slowly, teasingly pull them down his legs.

“Don't wear any tomorrow?” he asked, his voice husky with desire.

“Yes,” Severus breathed as James leaned down over his lap and took his cock into his mouth.


	4. Chapter 4

Severus was desultorily lying in the too small bed in his 'home' on Spinner's End, bored out of his skull. Lily was away on holiday with her family, his parents weren't speaking to each other and Severus didn't particularly want them speaking to him either, and his school books would not arrive until August, when Hogwarts would send the battered, sixth or seventh hand charity textbooks to his house so that he could complete the few summer assignments his professors had assigned him. It might have been alright if he'd only been able to use his wand, but he wouldn't turn seventeen for nearly another year. A lifetime, it seemed.

It had been two weeks of summer _hell_.

And, what was worse, Severus realized that he missed James, and not just the feel of his body. Severus could bring himself off- and did, often, to relieve the boredom- but having grown used to being regularly pleasured by a beautiful boy with a generous mouth, he found his own hand distinctly lacking in excitement. But not only that, he missed James's optimism and cheerful good humor. He missed his chatter and he even missed the idiotic way he ruffled his hair and then looked embarrassed because he knew that Severus was watching him.

Well, and maybe the wind swept hair _did_ suit James. Severus would certainly never admit it.

He missed James's smile and his sparkling eyes and the way he told funny stories in a breathless, hushed way, as though he had to speak quickly to get the story out before he burst out laughing. There were many things Severus didn't miss about the boy, but on the whole, he found that he seemed to remember the good things more easily than he remembered the bad things.

Severus turned over in his bed with a huff and clutched his pillow to his chest. He didn't know why he tortured himself with the thought of James anyway. He hadn't heard a thing from the boy, and it wasn't because James didn't have an owl because Severus knew he did. Severus also knew that James and Sirius had reconciled their friendship enough that Sirius was spending part of his summer with James and his parents. No doubt Sirius was keeping James too busy for him to think about Severus. Or, more likely, Sirius was poisoning James against Severus, telling him lies (and perhaps some truths too) about Severus and convincing James that he didn't need the Slytherin. Maybe Sirius really was sucking James's cock for him now and he wouldn't have use of Severus anymore.

Such thoughts maddened Severus and he rolled out of the bed, pacing his shabby little room angrily. Through the open window he could smell the briny, sewage smell of the river near his house and he went to the window, staring out into the hot, bright sky. It was a nice day and he knew any other boy would be out enjoying the sunshine, but he was too disgusted with his life to do so.

He was turning away from the window to go and read, once more, one of his old textbooks when he noticed something large in the sky, flying towards Spinner's End. As it near he realized it was an owl and he frowned at it. His father went practically mental when his mother received correspondence via owl and would be angry by such a conspicuous bird. He leaned out, watching it, but instead of flying down to the front, where his mother would be at this time of day, the owl flew straight at him. He stumbled back in his room and a beautiful great horned owl flew straight in the window and settled on a broken bedpost. It had a small package and a note tied to its foot.

He felt a wave of dread, thinking it was another message from Avery, but when he hesitantly reached out for the envelope and package it had clutched in its claw he recognized James's untidy scrawl instead. He inhaled sharply and tore open the letter first, his hands shaking a little. Rather than the dismissal he'd half expected, James's note was rambling and disorganized but friendly. He told Severus about the holiday his parents had taken him on, which explained his lack of correspondence, and then Sirius arriving. He told him about shopping with his Mum and working in his father's garden. It really said nothing of consequence and it skated over anything resembling sentimentality, but Severus realized that by the time he was done reading he had a huge smile plastered over his face that didn't seem in any danger of disappearing.

James had ended the note by saying he'd instructed his owl to not leave until Severus had written him a reply, and when Severus looked up he found the owl staring at him in a pointed sort of way, as though Severus were not moving fast enough.

Before he wrote a reply, however, he pulled the little package open and delved into the contents. At first he was confused by the tumble of silky fabric that spilled out of the tightly bound package, but when he held one up his mouth dropped open in shock. It was a pair of silky, Gryffindor red pants, the fabric so fine and smooth that he could see the light from the open window shining through it. Severus picked up the rest of the little scraps of fabric and found more, with different cuts and colors and fabric types. Some were loose and breezy while some he knew would cling to his body and cup his genitals like they were painted on. In all there were a dozen pairs, no single one alike.

Within the package was another note and Severus picked it up, a little wary. 

_Sev, when we were on holiday in Paris Mum and Dad let me go exploring the marketplace on my own. I found a little shop full of naughty clothing. The shop witches said I was too young to buy ladies' knickers (ha!) but I could buy clothes for myself, so I've sent you a dozen pair. I will spend the rest of the summer thinking of you wearing them and expect to see them in person come fall._

_James._

It was such a strange gift for one sixteen year old boy to give another and Severus was a little befuddled for a moment before he realized he would no longer have to wear his father's dingy, cast off pants. Smiling, he held the silky fabric in his hands and let the slick materials slide through his fingers, imagining how it would feel against his skin. 

A sour thought, that this was just James's way of bestowing charity upon Severus, occurred to him, but for his own sanity he suppressed it. And besides, James was much too self centered to have even noticed that Severus was lacking in funds or adequate clothing. James was an odd boy and it shouldn't surprise him that any gift from James would be for his own benefit in one way or another. 

Severus stood up the find a clean sheaf of papers and a quill to send James a reply, but when he did his gaze caught on the note from Avery he'd hidden in his school notebook. It was a note inviting him to an informal Death Eater meeting and an opportunity for Severus to meet some important witches and wizards who could help him after graduation. 

In the latter part of the year Severus had distanced himself from Mulciber and Avery to appease Lily, who hated them, but at the train station before they'd left Hogwarts Avery had slipped him the note. He'd initially dismissed it, but as time had gone one he had to admit that he'd been... tempted. 

He'd been bored and forgotten by his friends that summer, so why shouldn't he go, after all? He was curious about the group and the power they seemed to attract wherever they went. And he for one knew that dark magic was often a lazy term for _powerful_ magic, no matter what Lily said.

And yet... his eyes moved away from the note and back to the handful of silk he clutched. It was a silly thing, the little scraps of fabric, but it was a reminder that he hadn't been forgotten. And it would dismay Lily so much for him to continue his friendship with Mulciber and Avery...

Severus crumpled Avery's note and tossed it into the waste paper basket beside his bed. It was a symbolic gesture, mostly, but it settled the matter in Severus's mind. He wasn't ruling out the possibility he might meet the Death Eaters, but it could wait, couldn't it? He was still young and it didn't seem worth the risk to lose Lily and James over it, not now while they were so prejudiced against it, anyway.

Severus pulled a sheet of blank paper out of his notebook and began to write back to James, a smile still lingering on his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeah, he bought him pants. I know it's weird, but didn't you want to buy poor Snape some decent underwear after the Snape's worst memory chapter? Poor baby.


	5. Chapter 5

Severus had found Lily on platform 9 and three quarters like a magnet pulled to its mate. Even though he'd seen her earlier in the week, as always just the sight of his dearest friend filled him with happiness and hope. If he'd been heterosexual he'd have been in love with her, but as it was she was a combination of friend, sister and mother. It was really asking too much of a sixteen year old girl, but he'd been so lacking in every one of those categories that he hadn't been able to help himself.

Lily's family greeted him cordially, but their attention did not linger. They were interested in the witches and wizards around them and the little glimpses of the magical world that never seemed to grow old to them, no matter how much they were exposed to it.

“Are you excited about seeing James?” Lily asked mischievously, her voice low. Her parents had very Muggle views about homosexuality, and she didn't want to shock them. 

Severus gave her a quelling glance and lifted his beaky nose into the air, as though he were above all that. That was, until James spotted him and pushed through the crowd, boisterously calling his name. Severus was both embarrassed and elated, especially when curious heads turned in their direction, the novelty of their relationship not having totally worn off.

When James was near enough to speak his eyes went round. 

“Merlin's balls, you've gotten taller!” he exclaimed, coming near enough to Severus to hug him but drawing to a halt before he went through with the action. His whole body leaned towards Severus, as though he yearned to touch him, but he kept his arms at his sides, perhaps shy around so many adults.

“You haven't,” Severus said, looking down at James and realizing for the first time just how much he had grown over the summer. All he'd known was that when his mother had opened up her dusty purse strings and purchased him two newish pair of trousers for the school year he'd had the legs tailored extra long, fearing he'd grow even more.

James just shook his head and grinned. “You're sitting with me on the train,” he said, his voice spoiled and accustomed to being obeyed, but Severus was too pleased to protest his assumptive statement.

“Alright,” he said, and blushed a little at his own passivity. It was very unlike him, but he found he didn't care.

“You're voice has gotten lower too,” James said, and this time he really did take a half step nearer, the distance between them no longer enough to remain convincingly platonic.

“Go on, then,” Lily said, jerking her head at the train and lifting her eyebrows. “Before you give the whole platform a show.”

Severus flushed and fumbled at his luggage. “What? No!” he denied, but James just hooked an arm around Severus's and began to pull him to train. Severus hastily bid Mr and Mrs Evans a good day and let himself be led.

“Mum and Dad brought me half an hour ago. I've already loaded my luggage but I was waiting for you,” he said. “Those were Lily's parents, right? Did they bring you? Where are your parents?”

Severus didn't like the direction the barrage of questions was leading them and he'd have taken a hex to the head before admitting he'd taken the bus into London and walked to the station alone, so he focused on the first part. “You were waiting for me? Where is Black?”

James waved a vague hand. “Around,” he said, which Severus took to mean he'd seen Black recently and so could afford to spend some of his free time on Severus now. The idea made him feel a little petulant, but it was difficult to feel resentful when James kept glancing over his shoulder at Severus, as though reminding himself that his lover was really there. And besides, tucked into a corner of his shabby trunk was a sheaf of letters from James, a physical reminder that the Gryffindor had thought of him over the summer, even if he'd been with Black. 

And then there were the dozen silky drawers that he could feel even now rubbing coolly against his sensitive skin.

On the train James did his best to find an empty train compartment they could sit in but had no luck. When James stuck his head into the car with Lupin, Black and Pettigrew he withdrew hurriedly, though not before Severus saw the murderous look Black shot him. Clearly the boy was disappointed he'd been unable to turn James against Severus over the summer. Severus gave Black a triumphant sneer before he turned and followed James.

Ultimately they ended up in a compartment with four first year girls who huddled on one bench and watched them with round, awe struck eyes. Consequently their interactions were stilted and overly formal to avoid anything that could be considered inappropriate in front of young children, but even when all they were doing was just looking at each other awkwardly, unable to touch, Severus still liked being with James. 

Only once did James's hand drift over, his palm casually resting on Severus's hip for a moment that could have almost been friendly, to an outside observer. But then he felt a small disturbance at the waistband of his trousers and the insertion of a single finger under the band, seeking out the silky fabric below.

James grinned and withdrew his hand, looking smug.

**

James tried to sit with Severus that night during the Sorting feast after the first years all took their turns with the Sorting hat, something that was practically unheard of during a time when most houses were busy welcoming their new members. 

“You should go,” Severus whispered to James when the older Slytherins hissed and jeered at James. They had been hostile to James last year when he'd begun eating breakfast with them, but it hadn't been nearly as serious as it seemed to be now. Avery and Mulciber in particular were giving Severus and James the sorts of looks that meant nothing good, making Severus think uneasily of the invitation they'd extended him over the summer that he'd ignored. 

Mulciber shifted in his seat and Severus, with a jolt, realized that Regulus Black had been sitting beside him, hidden by the older boy's bulk. His chin was up proudly and his dark, angry gaze was on Severus, as though he'd been personally betrayed by him. He and Mulciber exchanged whispered words and a thread of unease settled in Severus's belly. He didn't like to see Regulus Black in Mulciber and Avery's company- not at all.

“James,” Severus said warningly, suddenly wanting nothing more than to get James away from them. He stood, putting his hand to James's arm to pull him away.

“There aren't any rules about sitting with your own house,” James had said coldly, standing his ground and returning the fierce looks that were turned on him.

Severus, fearing a fight breaking out, even under the watchful eyes of the staff, just tugged James away. “Come on, you idiot,” he hissed under his breath. “Those are not people you want to fuck with.”

“I'm not afraid of _them_ ,” James said contemptuously, but at Severus's insistent tugs James allowed himself to be led back to the Gryffindor table. 

“You admit it, then? You know that they're-” James trailed off, not wanting to make any accusations where they might be overheard. Everyone knew about the Dark Lord and his Death Eater's growing power, and most were too afraid to speak of it. Severus knew that James was too bloody egotistical and stupid to be afraid, but it wasn't something one spoke of lightly, and if James had expected Severus to spill his secrets then he'd be sorely disappointed. Severus, for one, knew when to keep his mouth shut.

Severus escorted James to the Gryffindor table, but when he tried to leave James just clung to his hand. “Severus!” he cried. “Stay. I haven't seen you in nearly three months.”

Severus looked uncomfortably at the Gryffindors, who, while not showing outright unfriendliness, were obviously wary. James's face was determined and hopeful and Severus knew his classmates would be as angry with him if he returned now or if he stayed and went back to them the next day. He supposed that he might as well please James for the moment, for no one else would be happy with him later.

He sighed and sat down heavily on the very outer edge of the bench, one arse cheek almost completely falling off, as though if he were not comfortable then he was not fully committed to his decision. Jame grinned and settled back beside him, his arm and thigh a warm stroke all up the side of Severus's body.


End file.
